the book of love is long and boring

This weekend, Jason and I attended the Justice Conference in Philadelphia. It was amazing in so many ways...there was so much passion, so much talent, so much faith. But mostly, for me, it was inspiring not because it made the idea of justice seem exciting or cool, but because of the opposite - it displayed examples of the doing of justice that was messy, gritty, painful and slow. Gary Haugen quoted Peter Gabriel's song - "the book of love (is long and boring)", and then shared about the work of IJM - the hours and months and years of work that finally resulted in the closing of a brothel, the setting free of so many girls. The hours of tediousness, seemingly fruitlessness, the weeks and months and years of "non-progress". Long. Slow. Boring. It resonated with me in this season of my work. Ten or so years ago, I felt a particular conviction to use my education for those who are voiceless - for those who are abused, abandoned, neglected, and unseen. I'll save the telling of that journey for another day, but after law school and a clerkship, I joined Catholic Charities as an immigration attorney to work with the immigrant woman who had been beaten by her husband, the refugee mother of three struggling to survive alone, the four-year old girl who had been raped, abandoned, and forgotten by her family. These people and their stories tugged at my heart, and I loved the idea of centering my work around them. Ten years later, today, these are my clients. The idea, in many ways, has become a reality. Three days a week I come to my office, and I meet with them, I listen to their stories, and I work on their cases. The reality of "working on their cases" involves lots and lots of forms, paperwork, waiting, more forms, more waiting, seemingly fruitless phone calls, unsympathetic judges, impatient clients. In the mean-time, I often start to forget their stories, forget God's presence in it all, and as I sit down to enter biographical information into the next slot of a form or as I wait for hours for our case to be called in court, the dominant feeling is...this is so inefficient and so boring. Am I spending my time in the most productive way possible? Shouldn't I be doing something more interesting? Is this really worth it? I love the idea of justice so much more than the reality of doing it. At the Conference this weekend, I was reminded that it is worth it [not least by things like this], because the long and the boring, the hours and days and years of slow slow work - this may be exactly what God had in mind for me when I first felt a calling in this direction. This may be exactly as it should be as I learn to act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with my God. And just maybe, I hope and pray, He is doing a transformative work in my heart that is long and deep and tried and true.